For some mums, returning to work can be a challenging time. Aside from the very real practical challenges of getting dressed, leaving the house and getting everyone out the door, returning to work can bring a whole range of emotional and psychological challenges too.
There may be guilt about leaving your child, worries about missing important moments, or anxiety about whether you can still perform at work after time away. Then there’s the juggle: work, childcare, meals, household responsibilities and, somewhere in amongst it all, finding time for yourself.
Research suggests that returning to work after maternity leave can involve challenges with work–life balance, work–family conflict and wellbeing. Workplace flexibility and support can play an important role in how women experience this transition (Franzoi et al., 2024).
For many women, it’s also a shift in identity. You can love being a mum while also wanting to reconnect with your career, independence and the parts of yourself that existed before motherhood.
The good news is that finding balance doesn’t mean doing everything perfectly. It means finding an approach that is realistic, sustainable and right for you.
1. Let go of the pressure to do it all
One of the biggest shifts is letting go of the idea that you need to be the perfect mum and the perfect employee.
Instead of asking “How can I do everything?”, ask:
- What actually needs to be done?
- What can be good enough for now?
- What can I delegate or let go?
“Good enough” is often much more sustainable than perfect.
2. Give yourself time to adjust — including to being apart
Feeling sad, guilty or anxious about leaving your baby doesn’t necessarily mean you’ve made the wrong decision. These feelings can be part of adjusting to a new routine and spending time apart.
It can help to establish predictable routines around childcare and goodbyes, gradually build confidence in your arrangements where possible, and remind yourself that being apart from your child is not the same as abandoning them.
You can miss your baby and still enjoy being at work. These things can coexist.
3. Rebuild your work confidence gradually
It’s completely normal to feel rusty after time away from work. Rather than expecting yourself to return at 100%, give yourself time to find your feet.
Set small, achievable goals in the first few weeks and focus on what you already know rather than everything that has changed.
A useful mindset might be:
“I’m not starting my career again. I’m returning to something I already know how to do.”
4. Share the mental load
“Helping” isn’t the same as sharing responsibility.
If possible, divide responsibility for the things that keep family life running — childcare logistics, appointments, meals, shopping, household tasks and sick days — rather than one person becoming the default manager.
Workplace flexibility and support can also make a meaningful difference when you’re trying to manage competing work and family demands (Franzoi et al., 2024).
Where possible, talk to your employer about arrangements that could make the transition more manageable, such as flexible hours, part-time work, predictable schedules or a gradual return.
5. Make space for yourself
It’s easy for your own needs to disappear when you’re juggling work and motherhood. But looking after yourself isn’t selfish — it’s part of creating a sustainable routine.
Make room for things that remind you that you’re more than a mum:
- Friendships
- Exercise
- Hobbies
- Time alone
- Your relationship
- Career goals
Returning to work can also provide an opportunity to reconnect with parts of yourself that may have been temporarily put aside during early motherhood.
You don’t have to choose between being a mother and being yourself.
6. Challenge the guilt and unrealistic expectations
When guilt appears, ask yourself:
“Have I actually done something wrong, or am I experiencing the discomfort of not being able to be everywhere at once?”
You can love your child enormously and enjoy your career. You can miss your baby while being happy at work. You can want time for yourself without being selfish.
Try to offer yourself the same compassion you would offer another mum in your position.
7. Build your support network — and know when to reach out
Don’t wait until you’re completely overwhelmed before asking for help. Support might come from your partner, family, friends, other mums, childcare, your workplace or a mental health professional.
Research examining the relationship between returning to work and maternal mental health suggests that the experience is complex, with factors such as work–family conflict, working conditions and social support influencing women’s wellbeing (Dagher et al., 2022).
For Australian mothers, returning to employment can also involve significant changes to employment and income following the birth of a child, making this transition more than simply a matter of managing a busy schedule (Australian Institute of Family Studies [AIFS], 2025).
Most importantly, remember that you don’t have to wait until things become overwhelming to seek support.
If anxiety, low mood, guilt or distress are persistent, intense, or significantly interfering with your day-to-day life, consider speaking with a psychologist or other mental health professional. Seeking support isn’t a sign that you’re not coping — sometimes having the right support can make a difficult transition much more manageable. At the Centre for Clinical Psychology, we have a particular focus on perinatal mental health. Book an appointment with our experienced psychologists at the Centre for Clinical Psychology in Melbourne by calling 03 9077 0122. We’re here to support you on your journey through parenthood.
Finding your balance
There is no single formula for being a “good” working mum. What works for one family may not work for another, and what works for you now may change as your children grow.
The goal isn’t to do everything perfectly. It’s to find a way of balancing work, motherhood and your own wellbeing that is realistic, sustainable and right for you.
And sometimes, finding your feet is enough.
References
Australian Institute of Family Studies. (2025). New mothers, employment and income: Analysis using the Person Level Integrated Dataset. https://aifs.gov.au/all-research/research-reports/new-mothers-employment-and-income
Dagher, R. K., McGovern, P. M., & Dowd, B. E. (2022). Examining the relationship between return to work after giving birth and maternal mental health: A systematic review. Maternal and Child Health Journal, 26(9), 1917–1943. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10995-022-03489-0
Franzoi, I. G., Sauta, M. D., De Luca, A., & Granieri, A. (2024). Returning to work after maternity leave: A systematic literature review. Archives of Women’s Mental Health, 27(5), 737–749. https://doi.org/10.1007/s00737-024-01464-y
